Saturday, December 26, 2015

What IS RELIGIOUS ABUSE? (EK style)

I share a set of (now 16 yr. old) twin sons with the EK. 

The EK portrays himself as a “Fundamentalist Christian” BUT behaves in ways that completely contradict this claim. He uses his religion only when it is to his advantage…but quickly justifies his “less than Christian” behavior by telling others this HIS situation is “DIFFERENT” and that I am “SO CRAZY and SO EVIL that I FORCE him fight ME like a demon”. HE would be willing to “JUST GET ALONG” and he just “does NOT UNDERSTAND WHY I am so nasty and vengeful” and also does NOT UNDERSTAND “How I could put our son’s THROUGH THIS”

….OH…of COURSE…it is because “I lost him and I am jealous and if I had treated him right he would NEVER have thought of leaving” after all he 
“Gave it his ALL for 18 years but I was simply beyond HELP and he had no choice but to move on and create a new home for our POOR CHILDREN…a REAL HOME”.

You see…as he told our sons last year…

”He DID THIS FOR THEM!”

When the one who was more verbal called “BS” and asked EXACTLY HOW this has “benefited THEM?!” he was told, 
“Someday you will understand…you are too young to have this discussion…PARTICULARLY about your MOTHER. You just go ahead and love her and just wait…you will eventually see…that I did this for YOU! One day you will see how you’re Mother REALLY IS and you will understand that this was NOT MY FAULT”

NOW HERE IS THE KICKER!

The EK SO CONVINCED a “Church” full of people that I am, not ONLY INSANE…but that I neglect my children and that I am the DEVIL INCARNATE…that he managed to get the PASTOR to state that he 

“Needed to move on because he needed a “Godly” mate in order to become what GOD intends him to be! 

HE GOT THE PASTOR TO TELL HIM THAT HE NEEDED TO LEAVE ME! 

HE did not decide at ALL, you see, the PASTOR ADVISED HIM to give up….
HE IS IN THE CLEAR! 
NOT ONLY the PASTOR…but the PASTOR is saying that GOD HIMSELF wanted the EK to discard me so that he could MOLD him into what GOD WANTS HIM TO BE. 

LOL!

The EK does not BELIEVE in GOD (unless he believes that HE IS God)! 

I have seen him put this “mask” on THREE TIMES when he needed it to achieve his goal…. and then remove it just as suddenly.

THAT is why I do not have the aversion to Christianity that some others feel. 
I do NOT blame all religion or all Christians for the EK's DECEIT.

IMHO, it would be like dressing up a PIG as a COW and then claiming that all COWS roll in the mud… when you were ACTUALLY looking at a PIG all along! 

TOTALLY ILLOGICAL to me!

Such is the delusion of a text book, covert, charming, Sociopathic Narcissist! 

Do you see what he has done there? 

REALLY QUIT CLEVER…and EVIL….

He has, first, blamed ME for this issue….that worked on the outsiders…but not on those who SAW WHAT HAPPENED…such as my children. 

Next he switched to saying it was my “mental instability” that he could no longer deal with it and he told my children that, though they might not see it NOW…they surely would! 

Still not HIS FAULT!

Then he tried to convince the children that THEY, somehow…or Rather his DESIRE to PROTECT them…was the cause of the break-up. 

Got to give the EK CREDIT…that MIGHT have worked if the kids had been a little younger and had not seen him “drop his mask”!

THEN, finally, he was ACTUALLY able to get a PASTOR (of questionable repute and with no TRAINING at all) but who still bills himself as a PASTOR and the leader of a “Church” to VERBALLY STATE that he had NO CHOICE but to discard me”. He convinced the congregation…with the support of the Pastor (whose boots the EK licked and whose words the EK fawned over)  and the new (very well respected) Victim who is a long standing member of the congregation….that I tried to have him killed…that I am crazy…that I have threatened him…etc. etc.

Later, if needed…he can tell our children that he was “led astray” by a bad Pastor and he is ...

STILL NOT AT FAULT!

He was SET! When he FORCED our sons to go with him to the CHURCH…their discomfort was NOT due to the fact that they were witnessing totally hypocritical and ridiculous behavior by their FATHER…NOT that they had been FORCED to be there…NOT that they were EMBARRASSED by his behavior and utterly MORTIFIED at the fact they had been DRAWN INTO his two year affair by being taken on DATES with this woman…and believing she was “just a church friend”… HAD NEVER MENTIONED THIS TO ME.

OF COURSE NOT!

Their “obvious discomfort” was a sign that I WAS “filling their head full of lies”….THAT I am “ungodly” “mentally disturbed” and that I WAS “mistreating them and trying to alienate him from the LOVING CHRISTIAN MAN”.

They RALLIED around him!

Several offered to TESTIFY in court that I was an UNFIT mother based on HIS LIES. MOST had, not only, never MET ME…but they never even talked to MY SONs.

Chief offering to testify was the PASTOR!

Now, in order to make the claim that he believed, and had witnessed, that I was “unfit” he would have HAD TO SWEAR ON A BIBLE UNDER OATH TO something that he KNEW that he NEVER SAW! 
Even if he was CONVINCED it was true…to say he witnessed it was a BOLD FACED LIE….because I had been in his presence for 10 minutes in TOTAL.

The EK is TRULY, masterful at deceit and can convince others of NEARLY ANYTHING!

THE EK HAD his POWER…
.
Because not only HE said he was right…
not only his new victim and his crazy, enabling, family…
NOT ONLY THE PASTOR and congregation of his “Church”….

GOD HIMSELF KNEW that I was simply “UNACCEPTABLE” and deserved what was to come.

I DESERVED to be TOTALLY DESTROYED…

and the EK PROMISED to PERSONALLY see that I WAS destroyed!

7 comments:

  1. The EK may be a clever one to deceive people such as his friends, lawyers and Judges, but we know that one day there is One that he and ourselves will stand before that we will not be able to hide even our intentions. Not all of those who say, "Lord Lord will be named in the Book of Life. I have so much to answer for and Praise our Lord that Christ came as a Living sacrifice to forgive my sins...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Certainly true...to forgive our sins that we are TRULY sorry for and OWN...not likely in the case of the EK!

      Delete
    2. I would like to add a GREAT BIG "HELLO!" to the EK who follows everything I write with SUCH OBSESSIVE INTEREST...THAT is one thing he never lacked...particularly when he is aware that it is about HIM!

      Delete
    3. What does the abbreviation EK stand for?

      Delete
    4. Anonymity requires that I not disclose that...just suffice it to say that it is a perfect description of my abuser! LOL!

      Delete
  2. I don't understand how their conscience never catches up with them. Do they never, late at night, alone in the dark EVER feel any sort of conviction of sin??! I know I am as capable of hateful acts as anyone, and I've proven it plenty of times. But I feel tremendous remorse and regret. Even when married to a narcissist, there is plenty of blame for both partners. Neither of us is perfect, and I wish I could go back and do better. But I still fall into the mistake of thinking he sees his fault too, and he always proves me wrong on that assumption.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, M She, I do not believe they do. A truly disordered narcissist/sociopath is (IMHO) completely INCAPABLE of believing that they are not JUSTIFIED in doing ANYTHING THEY DO. They TRULY BELIEVE (even though delusionally) that God Himself condones their actions....if they can believe in God at all...which I doubt. They are very apt to point out the sins of others but they feel UNIQUELY allowed to do whatever they feel is going to best serve them. THAT is why I doubt that they truly believe in God at all.

      Delete